Archive for self-care

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tranquility_4What do you get when you wear the hat of mother, father, nurse, teacher, employee, chef, and chauffer? One tired single mom is what you get. Picture an eight-armed; four-legged woman with a haggard face, furrowed brow, and drooping shoulders and you just might be looking at yourself. Too often single moms are so worn out from doing it all that they forget about caring for themselves. I have fallen into the super mom trap many times to count and I am sure you have too. 

Finding the time to pamper yourself is difficult at times, not to mention expensive, but I am going to share a few great ways to get your needs met without breaking the bank. All it will take is a few clicks of your mouse, a phone call, and a minimum of an hour of your time. 

So where can you get pampered at rock-bottom prices? Where can you get your hair and nails done for less than $20 bucks? Where can you get a 30 -60 minute massages or facials for under $45 dollars? Need a shampoo and cut for under $15? Well it is possible and likely right around the corner from your home or job. I love being pampered this way but I often don’t have a wad of money to plunk down for these services. I’m thinking technical colleges and universities. 

I got turned on about these cheap, but quality services when I was a teenager. My mom attended cosmetology school and I would go and get my hair done for as little as $5. Getting services through a beauty school, technical college, or university is a wonder alternative to going to a regular and more expensive service provider. 

To find schools in my area, I googled a service school I wanted including my city and state. For example I entered “beauty school Atlanta, Ga” and received several hits. I clicked on the links to the school and located the services page on the site. On this page I was able to find out the services they offered, prices, hours of operation, and a telephone number. It was very easy to do and now I am calling to book my first visit. 

I couldn’t believe how reasonable the prices were. The best thing is that there are so many services you can get this way. You can get spa-type services like massages, manicures, pedicures, facials, waxing body scrubs, etc at a fraction of upscale spa prices. Get you hair shampooed, cut, colored, or processed for next to nothing and you can feel comfortable because, though students perform the services, the experienced instructor is there to assist the entire time.

You can even get health services like dental exams and cleanings, optometry exams, and basically any service there is a school for. Visit your local and surrounding technical college and university website and see what programs of study they offer then contact then to see if they offer services to the public. This is the most affordable to get treated like a queen at pauper prices. Happy pampering!

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By Elizabeth Eckert

Self-love. Almost makes you feel uncomfortable just reading the phrase, doesn’t it? We know we’re supposed to be kind and compassionate to others. But loving yourself? Isn’t that … well, somehow a little selfish?

It is. And that’s exactly the point. There are times when “selfish” can be very, very good. When you’re in the midst of a healing crisis … trying like the dickens to work your way out of it and back to full, radiant health and wellness … that’s one of the times.

One of my regular blog readers recently sent in a great question: “How can there be so many of us that don’t embrace self love?” What I got out of her question was a request for some suggestions on making self-love more accessible. With that in mind, we’ll explore a few key tips.

  • Learn the subtle distinction between self-love and self-absorption. In my world, self-love means you care for yourself as you would a beloved other. You create a nurturing and safe environment for yourself, attend to your physical, emotional, and spiritual needs, and place yourself in the presence of those who support your highest good. From a place of self-love, you are healthy and balanced enough to allow your grace and light flow over onto those around you, spreading the joy.

Contrast that with self-absorption, meaning that in your mind, “it’s really all about you.” Not healthy, not balanced, not nurturing, and certainly no extra grace for the guy next door. Let’s just back away and forget we mentioned it.

  • Learn how little beings become big ones. You are not the bad one… The developmental psychologist part of me is taking over for a moment. When babies are born, their brain development is not complete. Babies can perceive when something really big and important, sometimes even traumatic, occurs. They cannot place that event in context. Therefore, when something troubling happens (as it inevitably does), a baby assumes that they are the problem. That they are bad, or unlovable, or dangerous, or not worth the trouble. Not true! Feed your spirit on this thought: God made you. It wasn’t a mistake.
  • Bless your family of origin and move on. If you happened to have been born into a family where nurturing was not at the top of the checklist, understand that your parents undoubtedly raised you as best they could with the resources they had available. It is natural for a young child to interpret their parents’ actions as being “all about them” (see the previous tip), but that generally isn’t so. Your parents’ actions are about your parents. If they were seemingly too critical, too distracted, too strict, or too lenient, understand that any other person born into your family on the same day would have most likely found the same situation. Parenting style often has more to do with the parents’ beliefs and resources and less to do with how an individual child is as a human being.
  • Make an independent choice about how to experience your cultural environment. Some cultures use criticism and fear as a way of controlling the minds and spirits of their members. Think of the stories you’ve heard about restrictive fear-based cults. While you may not have been raised in such an extreme situation, consider that some of the fear that may have intentionally been cast around you had more to do with controlling you than about the truth of who you are. You are fine. People who use fear in an attempt to control you are most likely insecure. Love yourself enough to move yourself to a place of safety and bring more supportive people into your life.
  • While a brief article like this one is by necessity just an introduction, the issue of self-love is critical to your health and well-being. You teach other people how to treat you. Until you can treat yourself with generosity and compassion, you’ll be walking a rough road. Professional therapists, counselors, clergy persons, and teachers or coaches are available to support your transition into a healthier state. If you’re struggling to reach a place of self-love, please find someone you trust to support you on your journey.

    Elizabeth Eckert coaxes, cajoles, and gently guides the creation of healing intent. She’s the founder of http://www.wordcures.com and author of Word Cures: How to Keep Stupid Excuses From Sabotaging Your Health. Align your whole self for health … starting today! Share “Arielle’s” real-life story: The power of positive healing intention.

    Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Elizabeth_Eckert
    http://EzineArticles.com/?Self-Healing—Overcoming-Obstacles-to-Self-Love&id=1854324

    Categories : Single Motherhood
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    100-secrets-coverWell I’m at it again! I’m giving away an autographed copy of my book, 100 Secrets of Successful Single Motherhood. It’s The Handbook for Single Moms who are looking for guidance on this journey.

    About the Book

    100 Secrets of Successful Single Motherhood is a compact book (just 42 pages long) filled with tips on how to successfully navigate single motherhood. In it you will learn the secrets of taking care of yourself, your money, your emotions, and your children without losing your mind. It’s easy to read and re-read for those times that you need a little inspiration.

    The tips in this book are gleaned from what has worked in my life. It hasn’t been a life without struggle but with time and experience I’ve learned how to navigate it like a pro. I want you to learn my secrets to single mom success and thrive.

    How to Enter the Drawing

    Now you have a chance to win a copy of the book. It’s as simple as sharing one tip that’s helped you be a better single mom (0r dad) in the comment. I’m sure all the tips will be awesome and I’ll want to give a book to everyone, but I can only choose one person. To make the choice easy (and fair) I’ll use a random number generator to choose the winner.

    2 Winners this Month!

    As a matter of fact I’m going to give away two, count ‘em 2, copies of the book this month because I forgot to do it last month. So go ahead and leave your tip now.

    Entry Deadline

    The deadline for entry is April 24 at 11:59 pm. You can read an excerpt now to see what the book is all about.

    Categories : Single Motherhood
    Comments (2)

    I am worn out, emotionally that is. Over the last couple of months I have been doing a lot of extra giving, especially to my kids. I love them so much and want them to have the best of me. I want to be emotionally present and assure them of my love and interest in their lives.

    It seems the fallout of being a single mom is the need to over express and give abundant reassurance that my kids are okay. They are loved and wanted. Continue reading “Operation Nurture Mommy: Free and Low Cost Ways to Take Care of Myself without Breaking the Bank” »

    Categories : Single Motherhood
    Comments (2)