The relationship between single moms and money is turbulent. Her struggle to get more to take care of her family seems endless and the more she tries it seems the more illusive it becomes. But a bigger issue with money is how to manage what she has and discover new ways to get a little (or lot) extra.

Here are seven tips for single moms that may make the relationship more agreeable:

1. Develop a spending plan to avoid overspending. The word budget conjures up the feeling of restriction and lack; so I like the word spending plan. When you develop a plan you feel more in control and it’s easier to stop overspending. Take into account everything you need first. List it all, and then assign a dollar amount to each item. It may take looking at past spending trends to get an accurate view of how much you spend for bills, food, clothing, car/transportation, and entertainment. If you bank online you have a ready source for seeing where your money goes.

2. Involve your kids in creating and maintaining a budget. They should know how the money is spent so that they can be more sensitive to money limitations. The older they get the more money they will want. When they know approximately how much money is coming in and how much has to go out to maintain a life they will be more sensitive to your role as provider. This might encourage them to find ways to earn money on their own.

3. Have a savings plan to prepare for emergencies. Putting away money for a rainy day is very empowering (I’m speaking to myself here too). It is hard to predict when an emergency will happen that requires a large chunk of cash. If you have money saved that is specifically for these times your stress level will go down significantly. You will not feel desperate and resort to uncharacteristic behaviors. It is recommended that you have $1k-3k in savings. If you can manage to save at least $500 that is better than nothing. Open up a separate account for your rainy day fund. Use your tax refund, raises, or other windfall of cash to fund this account.

4. Join a Credit Union to avoid outrageous bank fees.  Your money will earn interest over time in a credit union. Banks are notorious for nickel and diming people to death. There is a fee for everything from checks to account balances below a certain amount. Forget about all of that and join a credit union. There may be one available through your employer, your state, or your school. Join as soon as possible and rest easy that the money you deposit will start making money for you instead of disappearing because of the fees. Check out http://www.creditunion.coop/cu_locator/index.html to locate a Credit Union in your area.

5. Get child support payments direct deposited. There is nothing worse than waiting for a check to arrive in the mail from your ex. It is often a hit or miss deal and the frustrations that build are not good for you or the kids. If you are getting support through the state you should have that option. If you have an agreement with your ex insist on having the funds transferred to your account. The money will be taken out automatically so you won’t have to worry about getting the funds on time. If you are not getting child support please find a way to get it. For more information read my new ebook on the subject.

6. Find a way to make extra money from your skills and talents. I talk about this on my blog and now I am talking about it again. It is almost a sin to not have multiple streams of income. It doesn’t have to be consistent at first but enough to give you extra money for the special thing you want to do or have. You don’t have to have an MBA to run a business but you do need something you are passionate about or just be able to see what people need/want and fill it. Check out my blog, richsinglemomma.com, for side hustle ideas.

7. Change your thinking about money. For many people, especially single moms, money has many negative connotations. You don’t have it, there is not enough of it, and you don’t know where the next batch is coming from. We have a tendency to think that it is out of reach all of the time and we struggle with it.

The truth about money is that it is simply a tool to get the things we need and want. Of course not having it and thinking about your lack will not make it come to you any faster. When you change your thinking about money, see its true purpose, and realize it’s abundance you will have more of it. Whenever I have to pay a bill, write a check, or spend money I keep in mind that there is more where that came from. I will have more, not because I am doing anything special but because I just know that it will come again.
Sometimes we get so caught up in holding on to money with such tight fists that we fail to realize that a closed hand cannot receive more. So open your mind and your hands to begin receiving more money.

Excerpted from 79 Money Tips for Single Moms. Get the entire booklet when you sign up for the Free Single Mom Survivial and Success Kit.

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Samantha Gregory

Samantha A. Gregory is an author, consultant, and speaker. She’s a single-mom lifestyle, money, and parenting expert featured in The Washington Post, The New York Times, Essence Magazine, HuffPost, ABC News, and Mint.com.

Samantha founded the award-winning RichSingleMomma.com™, the first online magazine featuring personal finance, parenting, and personal development content and courses for single moms.

She aims to inspire women who are ready to thrive and not just survive in their single motherhood journey. Connect with her on Instagram @richsinglemomma.