As a parent, one of the most important decisions you can make for your child is which daycare, if any, to send them to.
Selecting the right facility is so crucial for the safety and growth of young kids. But how do you know which one is right for your child and in line with the values of your family? Should the current climate of the globe have an impact on whether or not you choose daycare at all? Check out these things to consider when deciding on a daycare for your child.
Is it important to you that they have continuous care and socialization?
A huge benefit of sending your child to daycare is knowing that they’ll have constant support, and they’ll begin socializing with other kids at a young age. These early years of growth are pivotal in child development, so it’s a good idea to get them around other little ones from a young age.
What does the daycare feel like when you walk in?
This is simple and straightforward, and it has a lot to do with your initial instinct or gut reaction to the facility. While it may not be brand new, consider whether or not it’s clean, well maintained, and up to date. Is the atmosphere happy and positive, or does it feel dirty and dingy? Does the space have fun decorations, new and well-organized toys, and comfortable flooring? Getting a general feel for the daycare before making your decisions is incredibly important.
Spend time researching the safety of the area.
Not only is it important that the daycare is in a safe part of time, but the facility itself should be secure. Leaving your children in the care of other people—strangers in many cases—is difficult to do, particularly when your kids are so little. Knowing that they’re in good hands is crucial.
Consider the cost.
Daycares do cost much less than a private nanny, but it can still be pricey. If you are able to stay home during the day or you have a relative you can reach out to for support, you may want to consider your financial situation. Will it be worth it for you to dish out the cost of daycare if you do have other options?
Understand the possibility of exposure to illness.
It’s clear that being around a lot of kids on a regular basis can lead to your little one getting sick more often. However, early exposure to germs can actually strengthen your child’s immune system so much that they’ll have fewer colds and infections further down the road. With that being said, during the current pandemic, it’s important to first reach out to your pediatrician before making any final decisions. They will know what’s happening on a local level, which can pertain directly to you and your young child. Make sure you’re comfortable with the precautions your daycare is taking. Know that if something does happen—whether sickness or injury—it’s important to reach out for help as soon as possible.
Samantha A. Gregory is an author, consultant, and speaker. She’s a single-mom lifestyle, money, and parenting expert featured in The Washington Post, The New York Times, Essence Magazine, HuffPost, ABC News, and Mint.com.
Samantha founded the award-winning RichSingleMomma.com™, the first online magazine featuring personal finance, parenting, and personal development content and courses for single moms.
She aims to inspire women who are ready to thrive and not just survive in their single motherhood journey. Connect with her on Instagram @richsinglemomma.
My first word of advice is to stop trying to do it all. Yes it’s easier said than done so here is a more realistic piece of advice.
Delegate.
Maybe that’s not realistic either so here is my final word on how to cope it all as a working single mom.
Let it go.
Delegate Everything to Give Others a Chance to Help You Cope
That’s what I do. I delegate tasks to my kids, my friends, my family, or anyone who I feel can and is willing to help or I simply let it go. The world will not end and I won’t get labeled the worst mom in the world if I don’t do it all.
My kids are older now so I can delegate the task of cleaning their room, the living room, the kitchen, the car; ok basically the entire house. When they were younger I felt like a terrible mom if I didn’t do everything and the house wasn’t spic and span.
I felt guilty and depressed because my house often looked like a hurricane hit it. But I was working and going to school full-time; trying to study and take care of my small children. My mom made me feel guilty whenever she visited and I did my best to try to please her and meet her standard.
Let It go to Save your Sanity
Finally, I let it go and let myself off the hook. I gave up trying to be super mom. I let the dishes and vacuuming go until I had the time (and energy) to do it.
If I had the money at the time I would have hired someone to come in and clean for me. These days if you can catch a good Living Social or Groupon deal, you might find a cleaning service for $25. I say treat yourself to it and relax your mind.
Be Selfish with Your Time and Limit Kid Activities
Another way to cope with it all is to forget about putting your kid in every sports, dance, or art activity. Those things will eat up your time. Decide if you want them in an activity and if so choose one thing per child and alternate seasons. If you have two children choose on activity and rotate every three months or so. This way you only have to get one child to one activity after school or on the weekend. You don’t get overwhelmed and you free up time to re-energize in the evenings and on the weekend.
A Single Mom Sanity Saver Case Study
A single mom friend of mine is in school, working, active in church, taking care of four kids and was burning out. She felt guilty that she wasn’t spending time with the kids and couldn’t help them with homework and get her homework done.
Homework Help Solutions
I encouraged her to do her homework with the kids so she could be available to help them. She would be setting a good example for them by diligently doing her homework. It was also a way to spend time with them too.
To Cook or Not to Cook
I advised her to stop trying to cook full meals each night. It is okay to have quick meals of breakfast for dinner, burgers or hotdogs with chips, or a bowl of cereal occasionally.
Getting a Nap to Energize Your Life
To get extra sleep, I encouraged her to nap on the sofa while the kids watched a movie a couple days a week. She could let them know in advance that she might fall asleep while watching the movie because she needed a little extra rest. This teaches kids respect and compassion as well as how to take care of their bodies. She would be present for the kids while taking care of herself.
Being responsible for doing it all is challenging and even overwhelming. But managing your life by adopting new ways of thinking and doing things can tame your runaway life.
Samantha A. Gregory is an author, consultant, and speaker. She’s a single-mom lifestyle, money, and parenting expert featured in The Washington Post, The New York Times, Essence Magazine, HuffPost, ABC News, and Mint.com.
Samantha founded the award-winning RichSingleMomma.com™, the first online magazine featuring personal finance, parenting, and personal development content and courses for single moms.
She aims to inspire women who are ready to thrive and not just survive in their single motherhood journey. Connect with her on Instagram @richsinglemomma.
As a single mom it makes sense that we would want a mentor for our sons. But with the recent news about the assistant football coach at Penn State’s alleged sexual misconduct (or worse) with young boys, it’s a reason to give pause to the potential dangers of letting unrelated family members handle our children.
Get the Facts Before You Trust Someone with Your Child
I’m not an alarmist and I like hear all the facts, but this hits close to home for me. When my son was younger I trusted a man to mentor him and help him through life. I was distraught at the possibility that my son would turn out to be another statistic, growing up without a father and no direction.
This is What Happens When You Don’t Get the Facts
The thing is, many guys know this about single moms and prey on us when we are in this emotionally charged state of mind. I let my guard down and let a man into my life that would do years of damage to me and my family, especially my then 2-year old son.
I married that man and lived to regret it. He was an abuser of the worse kind. His abuse, though primarily pointed at me, was aimed directly at my son. I cannot go into the details of the abuse but I have a strong belief that he molested him.
The Damage A Child Sexual Predator Can Do Last For Years
My son could not verbalize what happened to him in that way, but I know by evidence of child porn on my computer and the reactions my son had each time I tried to change his diaper (potty training was delayed) and bath him that something was terribly wrong.
I was smart enough to end the marriage quickly and begin the healing process for myself and my children. It has taken years for my son to get through this experience. He suffered post traumatic stress disorder for years. He acted out, his development was delayed, and he has trouble learning in the “traditional” way. He had/has multiple phobias including fear of water, insects, heights and dogs.
It is Possible to Recover From Abuse
The up side is he is now a very happy, friendly young man. He is loyal, polite, and willing to go the extra mile. He is now teaching himself to swim, insects don’t bother him as much; neither do heights. He is still leery of dogs and will panic if one comes too near him.
We have close ties with family so he gets along well and trusts my dad, brother, and brother-in-law.
With much prayer he is a “normal” testosterone-driven boy with natural athletic ability.
I’m proud of him but I often wonder what our lives would have been like if I had not let my fears and emotions cloud my judgement. What would life have been like if I had never let that man into my life, my home, and around my children?
I will never know, but what I do know is I always question any man who takes an extreme/odd interest in my son. He does not do sleepovers with any family other than my own. I make sure that every person involved in his life know that we are stable and happy so no need to interject your opinion or try to be a father-figure.
Living with Regret and Shame is Just as Damaging
I used to beat myself up about what happened in our family but now I know it is all a part of life. Rehashing it and living in shame over it is not the key to living a healthy life. It is also not good for my children to see me in a constant state of depression and guilt over past mistakes. We learn from them and we always move forward.
What happened with the Penn State assistant couch is horrible. I hope it will be a wake-up call for every single mom and every parent who entrusts their children to others. No matter how upstanding or polished a person seems, we have to trust our instincts and check them out.
Samantha A. Gregory is an author, consultant, and speaker. She’s a single-mom lifestyle, money, and parenting expert featured in The Washington Post, The New York Times, Essence Magazine, HuffPost, ABC News, and Mint.com.
Samantha founded the award-winning RichSingleMomma.com™, the first online magazine featuring personal finance, parenting, and personal development content and courses for single moms.
She aims to inspire women who are ready to thrive and not just survive in their single motherhood journey. Connect with her on Instagram @richsinglemomma.
A child care co-op is an increasingly popular option for budget-conscious parents with a large circle of friends.
In a co-op, parents take turns watching each other’s children. One parent might watch another parent’s child on, for instance, Mondays or two half-days, while another might watch the first parent’s children on a weekend evening or perhaps on Thursdays. In some groups, parents take turns watching everyone else’s children as a group, while in others they watch one family’s children at a time. This keeps the cost of child care down and keeps kids in the hands of caregivers parents trust.
If you think you’d like to start a child care co-op, consider these factors:
Can your and the other parents agree on a philosophy and goals? Will there be a certain number of organized activities?
Is everyone in the group punctual and reliable?
What would your behavior policies be? How can parents discipline other people’s children?
What will the children be fed? What will their eating schedule be?
How will the group manage when one parent is away for vacation or an emergency?
How often will the parents meet to discuss the future of the group?
Once your group is started, make sure each parent is doing the same amount of work. When another parent is in charge of the kids, back off.
A co-op is an affordable and increasingly popular way to provide care for your child. If you’re interested in starting one, find a group of people you trust, and work to create stringent guidelines to which you can all adhere.
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Samantha A. Gregory is an author, consultant, and speaker. She’s a single-mom lifestyle, money, and parenting expert featured in The Washington Post, The New York Times, Essence Magazine, HuffPost, ABC News, and Mint.com.
Samantha founded the award-winning RichSingleMomma.com™, the first online magazine featuring personal finance, parenting, and personal development content and courses for single moms.
She aims to inspire women who are ready to thrive and not just survive in their single motherhood journey. Connect with her on Instagram @richsinglemomma.
Hi! Welcome to RichSingleMomma.com. I started this website almost a decade ago because I couldn't find any blogs back then that helped single moms with money. I was having some success in that area so I decided to share what I knew about side hustles, making extra money, and managing money. Read more...
