Who Wants to Be a Single Mom Statistic?
CNN ran a story today about the increase in out-of-wedlock births. The story came on the heels of the newly published statics by the National Center for Health Statistics. The story was lengthy and covered almost all types of single mom households. Some are single mothers by choice, either though artificial insemination or a decision to parent with the partner and not marry. The others are results of “mistakes” due to inadequate or no birth control.
Problems But No Solutions?
Many people sounded off about the “problem” but very few had solutions. I think there are any solutions because we live in a society that prides itself on freedom of choice, displays ever increasing sexual and suggestive viewing material, and has a general breakdown in morals. Celebrities are glorifying single parenthood so it’s no wonder the rest of society, especially impressionable girls begin to see no problem with it.
Who Am I to Judge?
I am no one to judge because I am there. I have two children and I am not married. The number of single mother households currently stands at almost 50%. This is due to a combination out-of-wedlock, divorce, and death of spouse situations. I dare not ask where the fathers are because the answers and reasons for their absence vary.
Try Something Different
The way things stand today, the best thing you and I as single moms can do is make the best of our situation. There may or may not be a responsible, kind and generous man in our future. Until that becomes a reality in your life make other plans to create the best life possible for you and your child (ren). I really hate statistics and though there is some truth in them it does not apply to most.
Don’t Wait for the White Knight. Rescue Yourself!
So what can you do? What will you do? It’s easy to sit back and wait for a miracle or some knight in shining armor to make everything okay, but that day may never come. Being a single mom, at least in the active sense is only 18-24 years (unless you have children that have huge age gaps). It seems like a long time when you are going through it but one day you will look up and your kid will be walking out the door and into a life of his or her own.
Roll Up Your Sleeves
You owe it to yourself to live the best life now. Begin turning your dreams into a vision then set goals and implement plans. You have full control of your life’s outcome. Statistics change, but not necessarily in your favor so don’t be slave to them; in fact ignore them and do your own thing really well.
A Treasure Trove of Resources
There are many resources on this blog. Search around and find out how to go back to college, start a business, or make a few extra dollars on the side. Get out of debt, get money wise, set budgets, and start saving. Your future is up to you and you kinda owe it to your children to be the best and be happy in the process. Download the FREE Single Mom Success and Survival Kit to get started on living the life of your dreams.
Samantha Gregory
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I saw that today. They never praise single moms do they. We are the backbones of our family and shouldn’t be criticized for keeping our families together and doing what we can. You have very good advice for us. Thank You.
I agree with you, not the statistics. I think that it should not be looked at as what parents are available for a child but the quality of parent.
Single moms seem to be lumped in together as some sort of lost cause. That is so far off the mark.
I am a single mother due to a divorce that I didnt see coming. My ex is not in thier lives at all. this was all a huge surprise as he had been a great father up until that point.
but for the past 12 years I have single handedly raised three kids, held a full time job, and attended school full time. Because of the way I raised my children, on my own but surrounded by positive people, my children often get compliments on thier manners, thier work ethic, and thier maturity for teens.
But, I see and read about single fathers all the time who are doing just as well if not better at raising children on thier own. There are also families where there are two parents, gay or straight, who are also raising upstanding children.
Labeling does nothing to say if a family is great or healthy. case by case by case, that is the only way to know how children will emerge from thier upbringing.
I can so relate to that!