It’s the age old tale, boy meets girl, they fall in love and get married, have a couple of kids, get divorced and move on with other people.
Okay, okay, that isn’t really the way we were told things would go, but the reality is, that’s the way things went for many of us.
None of us really got married thinking the person we married was anything other than “the one”. None of us really expected that who we vowed to spend forever with wouldn’t actually be a part of our forever.
And what in the world are we supposed to do when we finally get back into these dating streets and meet someone new? How are we ever to determine when we should introduce our new partner or potential partner to our kids? How are we to know when the time is “right”?
We don’t want to upset our kids. We don’t want to have people saying bad things about us.
The Bright Side
The thing to remember though, is no when or how you decide to introduce this new person in your life to the people you love and care about, especially your kids, you run the risk of upsetting your kids and having people say not so nice things about you and/or your choices.
However, another possible outcome to that is, your kids could meet, take to, and build a genuine connection with the new man in your life instantly and the people around you could be genuinely happy for and supportive of you and your decision to move on with someone new.
The truth is, no one can make the decision of when to introduce your new man to your kids for you but you and you need only listen to your heart. You see, no matter what other people feel or what they have to say, the decision is ultimately up to you.
I will, however, give you a few things to think about when trying to make the determination of when the time is right.
Live YOUR Life
Please know that despite what you may have heard or read, it is absolutely fine and actually pretty healthy for your kids to see you dating and happy.
Know that no one controls your life or your happiness, but you. Also know that it’s absolutely okay to casually date and also to introduce a guy you’re casually dating to your kids.
You don’t have to divulge any more information to your kids or anyone else that you don’t feel comfortable with. You can introduce the guy you’re casually dating as a friend (if you guys are just casually dating that IS essentially what he is right?) or… not. It’s totally up to you.
YOU determine what goes on in your life and if you think your kids are old enough, mature enough, or whatever enough to let them know that the guy you’ve introduced them to is someone you’re only casually dating, then do that!
If you feel it best to only introduce a man you’re dating to your kids if you’re dating exclusively then do that! Listen to your heart, your gut and you will not go wrong.
The “right” time is when YOU feel it’s “right” and THAT is what’s most important.
If you are a mom like me you loved the time with your child. The playing, the little dance parties, you ingest it in every inch of you and crave it more than chocolate. Then a divorce happens and a court puts you on a diet of this amazing experience.
So how do you deal with this sudden change in your life? How do you go without or at least less of what you once had whenever you felt like walking in their room? It’s hard at first but you will find that it will make you a better parent when your time does come again.
For me it was crying for days then I realized I had to use this time for him and for me. Here is my plan:
Give Every Weekend a Theme
While the goal should always be to make a better home for them and for you-both within and outside yourself, feel free to target it down to a more specific theme. Personally I am focusing on financial agendas and preparing to be the financial and emotional caregiver my child needs. I also use the time to apply to more teaching and writing jobs as well as responding to opportunities.
For you it could be making a cleaner home or even cleaner eating. Be there for you by preparing for them and their future.
Keep a “I can do it then list”
You know those “Oh yeah” moments when you remember things you need to do? Well now it can be done then..I literally have on my phone a list just for this time. It’s all the things that isn’t urgent but would really be great if it was done already. This can be calling a family member or talking to a financial advisor now that you are only 1 for 1 so to speak.
This will not only fill up the time but space out the time you have for your child and allow you to focus on them when it’s your time with them without feeling stressed that there is so much to do. Put everything on it-even things you have put off before the divorce.
Get Back Into Your Passions
Take this time to evolve your passions-some you have to admit were ignored while you lovingly heard “Mommy!” on a daily basis. For me, I started writing again (enter this column) and began to watch Project Runway and doing the challenges. I also started looking into restarting yoga which I did weekly back when I interned at the White House and miss.
This will allow you to fill in the gap so to speak with a bit of you and even give you something to talk about with your child when they come back. In fact, I have a new children’s book idea as a result of talking to my kid about things I am writing about.
Use the time to Research how to be a better mommy
From organization to better eating for us and our new home, I have finally allowed myself time to get into the pile of magazines that were pushed away for Legos. I also reviewed the home equipment I had and asked family to donate tools and other items I knew I was going to prospectively need in the future.
This may be a given (better mommy) but it also allows you to reconnect with your child even while he’s not there. I get to look at his artwork while I figure out a filing system for it. My son and I are trying new foods together and we got ourselves a crock pot recently. You should also do some research about yourself too. I recently finally went to a cholesterol specialist-never had time for that and now that I am a single mommy, my health needs to return to priority.
The bottom line: take the time for you and for them to be enriched and readied for the future. Of course tears will come and for me they still come to this day, but when you wash your face—get back to work.
Heather Piedmont
Heather is a Politico turned special needs single mom who just started journaling her path for other single mom’s. She lives in NYC with the greatest kid ever.
Self-directed learning is the best approach to life-long attainment of knowledge. If you’re considering it to traditional learning methods, this article gives an excellent overview of the processes it entails to encourage the best results in learning.
Imagine a situation where you’re an average student, and the opportunities accorded to you cannot change your situation. Do you throw in the towel and declare education a no-go zone for you, or do you try to learn about things that can potentially change your situation or others for the better? Unfortunately, not everyone realizes that they have the power to change their futures.
On the flip side, though, the power lies within us all to learn about things that would change our situations and the environment around us for the better. Self-directed learning is the process through which individuals push themselves to realize their needs in learning with or without others’ help.
They will then develop their own learning goals while identifying materials that can aid them throughout the learning process. In today’s’ world, where technology is rapidly taking over, there is a need to continually re-skill and learn about new ways of doing things. It is essential to re-learn things we previously knew and discover them deeper.
When you develop self-directed learning strategies to change a situation where you need to learn new skills, you put yourself ahead of those who only rely on traditional learning methods. Today’s world is set up in a way where self-directed learning skills are necessary, but essential to career, social, and even self-development.
In a world where self-directed learning activities are encouraged, and learning tools are many, it makes sense that one takes advantage of all the self-directed learning methods available. Any student who wants to succeed in their learning experience should have a self-directed learning plan that’ll help them bridge gaps that they’re facing in their journey to attaining knowledge.
We must encourage this type of learning for all learners. Here are a few tips on how to do it.
Determine the Willingness to Learn
Self-directed learning challenges exist. A student will find self-directed learning much easier if they can get self-directed learning examples and conduct a thorough assessment of various factors. These include their attitude, skills, habits, and even their support network and how these factors will contribute towards their success in self-directed learning.
Before students engage in self-development, they must look at any past experiences they’ve had in the past with self-learning. This will play a huge role in developing self-directed strategies that’ll allow them to have a constructive process.
Some of the most important aspects or skills to evaluate for a student include their organization, self-discipline, experience with self-directed learning, and how well they take constructive criticism. A student looking to engage in self-directed learning is encouraged to embrace being autonomous and practice excellent communication.
Identifying Self-directed Learning Objectives
While encouraging a student to take up self-directional learning, the student must learn how to communicate effectively. This is a necessary skill to learn as they’ll have to develop a relationship with an instructor. When communication skills come into play in self-directed learning, both sides have to understand what expectations are required.
The instructor supervising the student should have a clear view of the self-directed learning goals the student has. Likewise, the student must have access to the contractor’s self-directed learning contract. Understanding each other ensures that both parties are privy to what is expected from each one of them.
Learn More About Yourself and the Process
There are many self-directed learning benefits a student will reap if they understand their needs for self-directed learning. As learners, one must understand the gaps they need to fill and how their approach to self-directed learning will help them fill these needs.
Self-directed learning requires the student’s total transformation because they’re required to learn new ideas and understand them on their own. Self-directed learning will require more in-depth knowledge than traditional education, where a student is only required to learn what is taught to them to complete a course.
In self-directed learning, a student is required to motivate themselves and dig deeper into their studying to bridge their gaps. It is, therefore, essential to develop an in-depth approach to self-directed learning.
Evaluate the Learning Process
In self-directed learning, students must learn to self-evaluate and self-reflect continually. This is to assess their progress and how their learning goals are coming along during self-directed learning. Some of the processes students of self-directed learning will need to engage in include:
– Regular consultation and assessments with their instructor while implementing feedback received.
– Reflection of the aspects learned during the self-directed learning process and evaluating the essential questions concerning the learning process.
Share and Apply What You’ve Learnt
There’s no point in self-directed learning if you’re going to hoard what you’ve learned and kept it to yourself. The best way to learn something more profound is to teach it. It’s therefore essential that after you’ve learned and finished your unit, you share the information you’ve gained with your mentors and peers.
Sharing what you learn in self-directed learning is essential, as it’ll help you discover other aspects you hadn’t thought of. Ultimately, you’ll create something positive for you and your community or environment out of your self-directed learning experience.
Once you start to practice the things you’ve learned on your self-directed learning journey, you can now create opportunities for yourself that never existed before.
Conclusion
Self-directed learning isn’t an experience or process for faint-hearted students. It’s a journey that requires patience, a strong will, a willingness to learn, self-motivation, and strategies that’ll get you to where your goals are.
It would be best if you valued the progress you’re making over performance. Self-directed learning is a life-long process that one can’t accomplish if they value performance overdevelopment or in-depth knowledge.
Have you considered self-directed learning as an alternative method of learning? If you have, what has been your experience? How did you overcome the challenges that come with self-directed learning? Tell us your experiences in the comments below. We’d love to hear from you.
Author’s Bio:
Sherry is a consultant and been involved in many successful projects with a range of companies throughout the country. She enjoys researching, discussing, and writing on the topics of relationships on the best dating sites 2020, when not absorbed in the latest gripping articles. Sherry loves cooking, doing sports, and otherwise spends far much time at the computer.
Description – Has social distancing and shelter in place measures put your romance plans on hold? Never fear! Virtual date nights are the future, and we’ve got loads of handy hints and tips to make your night special. From online quizzes to private concerts, we’ve got the expert know-how to break the virtual ice.
Nothing kills the magic of a first date quite like quarantine. Fortunately, in our technological age, it’s easier than ever to connect without meeting in person. No, we’re not just talking about the best dating sites 2020. We’re talking actual, solid date ideas to help you virtually break the ice and get to know your date. So, whether you have a date lined up, a long-distance partner, or you’re still on the lookout for love, we’ve got some ideas for you. Here we go – 10 virtual date ideas coming up!
Virtual Date Ideas
Cosy Movie Night
Dinner and a movie have never been cozier. Streaming app extensions on platforms like Netflix and TwoSeven allow you to sync your screens so you can still enjoy a film together on your virtual date. Order pizza to your respective addresses to start, and then get yourself cinema ready with some popcorn and ice-cream for the show. Snuggle into your pajamas and get watching – what could be better?
Take a Virtual Museum Tour
Galleries, museums, and exhibits around the world are adapting to quarantine by providing virtual guided tours. Get tickets for you and your date and take in the fascinating culture of the National History Museum or the opulence of the Louvre. You’ll feel like a celebrity getting your own private show, and the artefacts and exhibitions will provide you with plenty of virtual date conversation for afters.
Take-Out with a Twist
Virtual date plans don’t need to be extravagant. A simple thing like sharing your favorite take-out spot can be a fun, new experience. Take it in turns ordering from your go-to places or, if you’re feeling adventurous, try a meal prep service and cook together with the ingredients that arrive. You’ll get to show off your skills if you’re a whizz in the kitchen, and it’ll certainly give your virtual date a laugh, if not!
Tune in to a Podcast
Hunting for virtual date activities that make for pithy conversation? Sync up online and tune into a podcast together. You can choose any topic you like – from astrophysics to film, and there’s more than enough to pick from. You can even choose politics if you’re feeling brave! Chat in messenger while you listen if it’s life or pause every so often to share your comments and thoughts if you choose a pre-recorded one.
Try a Baking Challenge
Baking is an exact science and a truly, impressive skill – plus, you get to enjoy a delicious treat when you’re done. Mix it up in the kitchen by suggesting that you and your virtual date have a bake-off. You can make your recipe choice as quick and easy or as tough as you like. Make sure to prop your phone or laptop up somewhere that you can appreciate each other’s culinary efforts, then sit back for a chat while your creations bake.
Quiz Your Date
Virtual quizzes don’t have to be reserved only for family gatherings. Choosing a fun quiz for you and your date is a great way to get to know each other. Plus, it’s a chance to ask your virtual date questions about themselves and is bound to get you talking. If you’re feeling romantic, you can even try the famous 36 questions which psychologists suggest are designed to develop a deep connection.
Recreate a Book Haul
Wondering how to have a virtual date that incorporates your interests and hobbies? If you and your date are both big readers, why not try a virtual book haul? Get your five favorite novels down from your bookcase or the three you read most recently and ask your partner to do the same. Comparing your picks can lead to awesome conversation and might even give you some new reading ideas. You could do the same with films or bands you recently went to see. Just remember to stay open-minded and ask your virtual dates questions about their choices.
Take a Virtual Date Vacay
Of course, real-life holidays are off the cards for most of us at the moment. Technology is a wonderful thing, though, and getting creative with Google Maps or Google Earth can be a fun substitute. Pick a destination you’ve always wanted to go to and plan a dream route for a future holiday. This is also a great virtual date for long-distance couples. Show each other around your hometown or your favorite spots nearby. It’s a perfect way to share each other’s lives and day to day experiences while living apart.
Bring the Club to You
Missing summer festivals and live music events? Join the club – literally! Plenty of huge artists are performing intimate, live events on streaming platforms or via their Instagram and social media feed. Look out for larger-scale virtual festivals and concerts that host a range of different artists. A great resource for live music is NPR’s Tiny Desk Concerts. They put out live content every evening from huge names and from independent artists.
Virtual Date advice will always tell you to keep things personal if you can. So, if you’re a musician yourself, give your date a private performance. Or download a playlist of your favorite hits and have a dance party with your date. You’ll have fun, work up a sweat, and can compare music tastes when you get tired.
Get Competitive
If gaming is your thing, there are plenty of ways you can team up online to take out the competition. Online apps like Houseparty provide plenty of gaming options, such as puzzle and art games. Enjoy unleashing your competitive side while getting to know your partner through their reactions and style of play. If you and your virtual date are both regular gamers, hop on your PS4 and enjoy a two-player like Overcooked or Mario Kart. A team game, like World of Warcraft or an open-world game, like Elder Scrolls online, that you can explore together and that make a great fantasy first date.
Conclusion
Dating in 2020 perhaps hasn’t been the fun-filled, real-world adventure you might have hoped for, but there’s still time to have fun. Virtual date nights can bring out your best side and leave plenty of chill time to get to know your partner face-to-face, if not in person. Until you do meet, you can relish date nights spent in your comfy clothes without spending money on taxis or nights out. We hope these virtual date tips have given you some inspiration for planning your next online date!
Final Call: Have you tried virtual dating? How did you make it fun? Have you tried any of these tips? Was the date a success? Share your stories in the comments!
Author bio:
Aria Green is a family photographer, relationship psychology writer. A wife and a mother of two adorable kids who won’t get bored even for a minute. She completed a photography course in college. Since then photography is her passion. As for a writing passion, she loves personality psychology, helping people with advice on the relationship between a man and a woman.
Our society as it evolved to adapt to the culture being cultivated by different factors has created standards that influenced who we are and how we should be as women. All these have triggered ripple effects on the values that make each one of us unique from each other. As women, we are born with special attributes that prepare us for our critical role as the foundation of this society.
A defined woman knows that educating herself in every way possible, from higher education to common sense manners, empowers her to become a woman of ingenuity and dignity. Knowing it is not her dress size or the money she possess that brings her satisfaction in life. A real woman knows that wealth and beauty can be temporary, but her inner character is the standard measurement by which others will ultimately judge her as a person.
You’re going to experience a lot of setbacks in life, but they don’t necessarily have to determine whether you’re successful or not. It’s your attitude towards the future that will determine your altitude.
Embrace the unknown. Life always goes with some certain complexities which we always thought would not exist. But it has the best and most thorough purpose that usually comes with a lot of excitement. What they don’t generally come with is an instruction manual. But powerful women don’t let that scare them. They embrace the uneasiness of the unknown with wide-open arms. Be brave enough to travel the unknown path, and learn what you are capable of.
Positive Attitude. Your life is as good as your mindset. Always remember that it’s the attitude you fuel in the beginning of the journey that could create a successful outcome. Deliberately use words that focus on constructive, affirming truths about yourself. With everything that has happened in the middle of the journey, it could drive you from idea conception to realization that things are either an opportunity to grow or an obstacle to keep you from growing. You have to train your mind to see the good in every situation. You only get to choose in between and always surround yourself with people who’ll encourage, inspire and believe in you.
Strong-Mind. Rule your mind, or it will rule you.Your mind has to be stronger than your feelings. You need to possess a healthy self image with a strong-minded attitude because it empowers you as a woman with confidence. You need to focus on being mentally strong to help yourself navigate fears, failures, and obstacles that come with growing a successful business and life. As a woman you need to have the resources, the mental skills and the capabilities to confront difficulties of all kinds with the qualities of sacrifice and dedication.
Self-care. You need to make yourself a priority each and every day. Practicing self-care isn’t always easy but it is definitely necessary. It’s no surprise that when we neglect our own self-care, it catches up with us. Fortunately, there are a couple of things you can do to engage in taking good care of yourself without feeling guilty. No matter which approach you choose, the goal is to figure out which strategies work best for you. Whether you decide you want to go on a vacation, take a hot bath, or enjoy binge-watching a TV series with friends, taking self-care time is imperative. Look for any ways you can incorporate it into everyday life.
Goals setting. First, consider what you want to achieve and commit to it. The real challenge in setting your goal is not determining if you want the result, but if you are willing to accept the sacrifices required to achieve your goal. It is important to have the key insight of your direction because you’ll never get anywhere just by riding the canoe without the paddle.
You’re endowed with greatness and only you who can take control of your life and views in the trials that you face in a positive way. Applying self-empowerment in your life can change your perspective and can help you see the brighter side of life.
Hi! Welcome to RichSingleMomma.com. I started this website almost a decade ago because I couldn't find any blogs back then that helped single moms with money. I was having some success in that area so I decided to share what I knew about side hustles, making extra money, and managing money. Read more...
