Cindy Wittman Interview

[00:00:00] Samantha: Hello everyone. Welcome to Hello Prosperity, powered by Rich Single mama.com. I’m Samantha Berger, your host, and today I have an amazing guest, Cindy Whitman, and she is the founder of Driving Single Parents. It’s an amazing organization, but I’m not gonna spill all the beans yet. I want you to hear from her what it’s all about.

[00:00:19] But first, Thank you for being here, Cindy, and I’d love for you to tell us a little bit about yourself and briefly about your single mom journey.

[00:00:27] Cindy: Absolutely. Thanks for having me. My name is Cindy Whittman. I live in San Antonio, Texas. I founded a nonprofit almost six years ago. It’s driving single parents.

[00:00:36] It’s where we help others. We help give vehicles to single moms in need, our single dads in need. And I also recently released a co-authored a book called Shattering the Stigma of a Single Motherhood. 

[00:00:50] Samantha: Just to chat about that book real quick I’m also a cool author with the book, shattering the Stigma of Single Motherhood, and that’s how Cindy and I met and I’ve just been in, in interviewing all the authors of this book because it’s such an amazing project, number one, and to be able to share our stories with single moms and to, especially whether they’re new single moms or they’ve been in the game for a minute.

[00:01:14] Those who may be veterans, single moms, there’s always this nagging stigma that society places on us about being a single mom and we cause all the problems and issues in society because of our kids, et cetera, et cetera. But we are shattering those myths and we are. Shattering that stigma so that single moms feel more empowered and so they feel like they don’t have to ha hang their head in shame, but can hold their heads up high because they’re doing one of the hardest jobs in the world and they’re doing it by themselves.

[00:01:45] When you rescinding.

[00:01:47] Cindy: That’s a hundred percent true. Now, I really wish people could have a full understanding of the fact that we don’t choose to be single parents. Most of us don’t choose that. It’s something that we just had to work through and work hard to get

[00:01:58] Samantha: through. Absolutely. Absolutely. So tell me a little bit more about your journey as a single parent.

[00:02:04] I know that you We’re a single parent. But you’re married now. Yes. But tell us about the single parent journey and then how you transition into marriage. Yes.

[00:02:12] Cindy: I got married really young and unfortunately, it ended up being a domestic violence situation. . And I always promised myself that I would never end up a single mother.

[00:02:19] I came from a single-mother home and I really just didn’t want that for my children. And so I tried to stick it out and I remember specifically one day I was on the couch watching Dr. Feel and. He said it’s better to come from a broken home than it is to grow up in one. that just spoke to me as, it’s as if they were speaking to me.

[00:02:37] And I thought, you know what? That’s right. Unknowingly by being terrified to be a single mom I am putting my kids through this and I’ve really gotta make a change. So I got up, I got a basket of clothes, a bag of diapers, and I moved out and made a life for myself and my girls. Fast forward I ended up meeting my husband and I got to a position.

[00:02:54] Where I could actually give back. And I really at first wanted to do childcare because as a single mom yourself, you know how difficult it is to get that childcare. And a lot of people really believe that it’s the government assistance is there to help them. Or help you, but that’s not true. It’s very hard to qualify.

[00:03:12] You have to have a job before you can qualify, but you can’t get a job who’s gonna have childcare anyways, I went and ran a poll to see if people would get on board with a nonprofit that helped single parents with childcare. Nobody would get interested. I couldn’t get anyone interested in that.

[00:03:27] And so I was, I gave up on that and I was down on myself. And I remember I was at dinner with my husband one. And just for some reason just hit me. I had been thinking, what can I do? What was my second need as a single mom? And I just like right there at dinner, I was like, oh, that’s what it’s, I stood up and I said, I’m gonna give away cars,

[00:03:46] And my husband looked at me and he said, he’s an attorney. , he sit down. You are not giving away a car. Never, just thinking about all the liability issues that could show themselves. Of course, I called over the waitress and said, what do you think about this? and she said, oh, I came from a single parent home.

[00:04:01] And that was a big struggle for us. We had to ride bus in the rain and, we couldn’t get to school sometimes and , I. I had the same experience growing up without vehicles. And so that night we went home and my husband went to bed. I woke up at probably 3 30, 4 o’clock in the morning and built the website and started the nonprofit

[00:04:17] And when my husband woke up, I told him what I’d done, and he just was shocked, wow, you’re really doing this? He was like, yeah, when I say I’m gonna do something, I do it. And so that’s where it all began, and seven days later, we gave away the first. To a single dad who actually was hit by a drunk driver and he lost his wife, his car, his unborn child, and his leg in the accident.

[00:04:39] Oh. And he was gifted the s u v, he still drives today, almost six years later. Wow. And it really, it was life changing for him.

[00:04:46] Samantha: I can imagine. That is amazing. I know that, even myself from my, on my website, I have had people, women, single moms, that’s one of the things that they’re, they ask about transportation.

[00:04:59] Can you help me get my car fixed? Can you help me find a car, something that’s cheap and you are absolutely right. The transportation piece is so big because without it, especially if you don’t live in an area where there is reliable. Public transportation subway or bus or what have you.

[00:05:17] And then of course taxes are expensive. Uber these days are expensive. And having your own to be able to get in whenever you need to go. Or come, that’s so important. So to be able to do that I’m just, I’m baffled really. . But

[00:05:31] Cindy: yes, it’s just a main, a real big tool that you need and especially with my situation with leaving a domestic violence situation.

[00:05:38] You, you can’t do that if you don’t have a car or transportation. You can’t do what I did. I worked two jobs, put myself through college to get to where I am today, where I’m able to give back. I would never have been able to do that without that little car that I had. . And it, it is so important to, to get to the doctor’s appointments, to even to h e b, the simplest things we take for granted every day.

[00:05:57] are big struggles for these single parent homes. , and, how are they supposed to get their kids to school, get themselves to work, and then better their lives so that they can stop that, dead end job and get higher paying jobs. Exactly.

[00:06:09] Samantha: Yeah. And not just that, even if there’s opportunities available, like I know there’s a lot of educational opportunities and I’m really big in promoting.

[00:06:18] Single moms getting into technology and there’s like boot camps, there’s classes, but if they can’t get to those classes or get to the boot camp, . And yes, a lot of things are virtual, but as the world opens back up again, then they’re gonna need to have a way to get to where they need to go in order to.

[00:06:36] Be able to receive that free education so they can increase their prospects for their career and be able to make more money. And so they can. So the, it is just the amazing cycle that you go through and the things you’re able to do when you have reliable transportation.

[00:06:53] Cindy: It really is a key to, it’s a key to independence, it really is.

[00:06:56] It’s a huge tool that can not only be empowering , but also be that piece that you need, that little tiny thing you needed to be able to drive you to succeed in life and get to better places. A lot of my recipients, I stay followed up with them all the time, and I love hearing those stories of, wow, miss Cindy, I graduated from college, or I got a higher paying job.

[00:07:15] I just bought my first home. , things like that they wouldn’t have been able to do. The tool of the vehicle that they were gifted from driving single parents.

[00:07:22] Samantha: Absolutely. So how many do vehicles do you give away every year? It really

[00:07:27] Cindy: just depends with the most would get away in one year is four.

[00:07:30] But it depends on funding. It depends. Cause a big thing for us is to make sure we don’t give somebody a burden. So obviously I try to go out and handpick each of those cards to make sure that they’re. Sound and able to function for a long period of time and not be a problem. We also pay all the tax title and license to make sure that they don’t have to have a two, $3,000 bill.

[00:07:50] The car goes straight into their name so they don’t have to worry about any other issues with that. So all they need is car insurance. So it’s definitely not a burden.

[00:07:59] Samantha: Sure. Yeah. Nice. Okay. And do you do you ever get people who want to donate cars? Yes.

[00:08:07] Cindy: People donate cards, people donate money.

[00:08:09] We partner a lot. Most recently, our last giveaway was a partnership with Carvana. And Connection, where they actually they’re the ones that provided the vehicle Yeah, so they, so we provided the recipients Sure. They provided the vehicle and they ended up giving her the taxes, of course, the car, the taxes, and they, I believe they gave her six months car insurance as well, and a gas card.

[00:08:30] And so it’s those partnerships. Service King is another one that we partnered with that has done gone leaps and bounds for us. . We have a mechanic shop that helps us out. We have a tire shop that helps us just to make sure that these people get sound vehicles that are not burden. Sure.

[00:08:46] Samantha: And is this mainly in your state?

[00:08:48] Cindy: Yes. Right now we’re just specific to Bear County. I definitely wanna branch out, but we’re so small at this point that we’re just trying to make sure that we can take care of here first. But partnering with these big cor bigger corporations makes it. A lot easier for us to, branch out.

[00:09:02] Samantha: Absolutely. And that’s, hopefully it will branch out to every state, because single moms are everywhere. I. That’s right. And

[00:09:09] Cindy: single moms and single dads. Yes. Single parents in general. They’re everywhere.

[00:09:14] Samantha: Absolutely. I know you talked about why you started this business or nonprofit. So how do you balance, your motherhood as, and then this business

[00:09:22] Cindy: It’s, it can be a challenge at times, but I love it so much that the nonprofit doesn’t feel like work to me. Just because it is hard work, it’s just so wonderful to catch up with these people who have done so well and change the lives that we have. So it doesn’t feel like a job to me, but I really think that it’s important to do things like that in your life that really help you feel fulfilled and help you feel like you’re making a difference.

[00:09:43] , and then it doesn’t feel overwhelming or exhaust.

[00:09:46] Samantha: Okay. Very good. This is a big, having a nonprofit like this is really a big thing. Just overall because of the capacity, the impact that you’re making into the lives of these single parents. What kind of legacy do you wanna leave your children?

[00:10:03] Just even in that regard.

[00:10:05] Cindy: I really just want whatever they feel passionate about, I want them to do that. I wanna leave that legacy of being a person who doesn’t just look at their circumstances and think, what can I do for me? But to think about how you can do for you, but then also give back and make sure that you do for others.

[00:10:21] And make sure that you’re bringing everybody else up with you instead of looking down on others. I think that’s really important to teach my.

[00:10:29] Samantha: How can people donate money? How can they donate vehicles? I’m sure you probably have a criteria, especially for vehicles donation.

[00:10:39] But tell me a little bit more about that.

[00:10:41] Cindy: Yeah, they can just visit our website. It’s driving single parents.org and we have all the information on there on how you can get involved, how you can donate, how you can apply for a vehicle if you’re in need. The qualifications to apply are very simple.

[00:10:52] You just need to have a valid Texas driver’s license via Bear County resident, and have the ability to obtain and maintain car insurance. , . What we do is we ask for a video after the, after we make sure you meet the memo criteria, and then we go through those videos. And those videos are a determining factor as to who we end up choosing.

[00:11:08] Nice. And so really the best way is to email us. You can email us at info driving single parents.org or just visit the website for all those details.

[00:11:17] Samantha: Okay. So outside of. A single parent having transportation. There are other challenges of being a single parent. So from your experience, like before you got married, what are some things that you experienced in that, in, in the single parent, I hate to say the word struggle, but it is a struggle at times.

[00:11:39] But what are some of the things that you did to get through that phase of

[00:11:43] Cindy: your. ? Well, I feel like planning was a big thing for me. I knew that I was gonna need to get out of the situation and to make a stable home for my, I was a stay-at-home mom at the time, so I knew to get outta that domestic violence situation, I was gonna have to create stability for my daughters.

[00:11:56] Not just financially, but emotionally. So I, really worked hard to come up with a plan to short term work, really hard, couple of jobs, and then go to. So that I could get something that my daughters could be proud of me. Working, towards that graduation and when I did graduate, the hugs I got that day meant everything to me.

[00:12:15] So those were really big. I think, like I said, planning was the big thing is just having the coming up with, okay, this is what I need to accomplish. This is how I’m gonna do it, and this is how I’m not gonna work myself to death for the rest. This is how I’m gonna be able to know my daughters. Because if I’m going to work two jobs and put myself through college for a super long-term time, that’s not going to give me the ability to get to know them, to raise them, to make an impact in their lives and be there for them on a daily basis.

[00:12:45] So I just decided okay, this is what I need to do. I need to get a set place. I need to work two jobs for now. Go to college, graduate, and then focus on one career. That is, I work Monday through Friday, eight to five. I have off holidays and week weekends and so that I’m able to be there for them.

[00:13:01] So I’m planning and then also being very good with money. You don’t have to have a lot of money. You just have to. You just have to be good with the money that you do have.

[00:13:10] Samantha: . Now that’s a really profound statement. I think a lot of people miss that part because we’re so busy wanting to get more and more money.

[00:13:16] But if you don’t know how to manage the money, then you’re back at square one. You’re always gonna need more. Yes. You’re always gonna need more. And that’s nothing wrong with needing more, but again, that management piece is so important. And then the example that you’re setting for your children about how to manage money how to.

[00:13:34] Of course earn money on your own, especially as a woman. And being, having that financial independence is so huge. Yeah. For parents.. So you worked the two jobs and then you are in college, and I know a lot of single parents are doing that, especially because they have made that plan, they’ve made that decision.

[00:13:53] So how did you do the self-care for yourself, even with all of that going on? .

[00:13:57] Cindy: I honestly, I look back at it now, I don’t even know how I did it. , , I have no idea, but I just knew that it was a short-term situation and I just kept hope with myself that like I am working towards a greater good and a goal, and I will get there and then I will be able to enjoy my life and enjoy my family and enjoy things in the near future if I just stick to this.

[00:14:17] Samantha: That’s good because I think one thing that people get discouraged about is if I’m working two jobs and I’m going to school, it feels like a never ending situation. But to have that focus and say, this is only temporary, like your situation is, Just temporary for this moment in time and that it’s not going to last.

[00:14:38] And I think that’s what gives us the most hope. And then having that graduation to look forward to and having this new career where you’re working one job, nine to five, or eight to five and being able to have those vacation time. That’s one of the things I said I wanted to do for myself because.

[00:14:52] I knew that the way the rate I was working, I could not really enjoy life if I was not working a specific type of job. And I wouldn’t have the time for my children. I wouldn’t be able to make the kind of money I wanted to make in order to afford transportation and never were to afford a great place to live in a great neighborhood and be able to afford just some of the nice things in life.

[00:15:13] So that’s, I’m so glad you brought that out. So what would you say to a, or what advice would you give to a single parent who was thinking about either starting a nonprofit or maybe starting their own business? What would you tell them?

[00:15:27] Cindy: I would certainly say do follow whatever makes you happy.

[00:15:30] Whatever business you can see in your future that’s going to make you happy or give back to others. Just follow your heart and really just have faith that you can do it. And keep in mind that you can do anything you put your mind to as long and if you love it, it makes it that much easier. Also do the research.

[00:15:45] Talk to people like yourself who know about finances, who talk to friends and family who haven’t dealt with business situations in the past or present. Get a mentor do those things because if you can see it in your mind, you can hold it in your hand. So you’ve really just gotta focus on getting yourself the courage to be able to do it.

[00:16:03] , and then surrounding yourself with people who can actually embrace you and then help you with your.

[00:16:08] Samantha: . Yeah, definitely have a supporters. It’s important. Definitely gotta have that . Yes. Being around people who can see the vision for you even when you can’t. That I think is a huge thing as well.

[00:16:19] Yes, ma’am. So I know that you, we’re both a part of this PR book Project Shattering the stigma of single motherhood. What made you want to be a part of the project and to write your story?

[00:16:30] Cindy: I just love it. I think it’s a fantastic idea. I do believe that there is a stigma out there, and I’ve experienced it myself where I’ve had people just, look down on me because I was a single mom, and really not take into account that we don’t choose this, , I have interviewed many people for my nonprofit that they might have lost their loved one and become a single parent because of cancer, because of a car accident. because of suicide even. There’s been so many circumstances where it’s domestic violence. It’s all these scenarios that when you get married on and you having the best day of your life, you’re not foreseeing that none of us sit here and plan to be a single parent, cuz it’s a very difficult job.

[00:17:06] . And so I really feel like. There’s that big stigma out there, and I want people to understand, and I want them to read our book and see that, we work hard, we’re single parents and we should, we’re proud of it because we didn’t choose this. It shows us , but we put our boots on and we got to work and we made the best of it.

[00:17:23] Any person can overcome what they’ve been through their past if they can just get the courage. Get the strength get the thought in their head of what they can do and put their mind to it. They can accomplish anything they want, whether they’re a single parent or not.

[00:17:36] Samantha: That’s right.

[00:17:37] That’s true. So where can people find a copy of this book?

[00:17:42] Cindy: Amazon has it for just 99 cents. And get your ebook today. And then later on in January 10th, we’re going to be releasing the paper copy, and that’ll also be available on Amazon, or they can order on either one of our websites or any of the other co-authors.

[00:17:57] On their list. Absolutely.

[00:17:58] Samantha: Yes. So again, I am just so thrilled to know more about the driving single parents program that you have. It’s amazing. And just to let everyone know, it’s currently only in Texas, but it may be expanding soon. So just go to the website., often so that you can find out if it’s going to be expanding maybe in your area.

[00:18:18] I am so excited that you are part of this book project as well, Cindy. It’s been an honor to be able to collaborate with so many amazing single moms who have turned their lives around who have. Put this, I think I, people will call it a badge of shame or this stigma, but it’s really a badge of courage cuz single motherhood, that’s the most courageous thing you could ever do.

[00:18:39] So true . And because motherhood is a hard job, but single motherhood I think is even harder. And so we have done the work, we have gone through all the ups and downs and we have. Made it to this place. And we are just really out here spreading the message that a single motherhood is not something to be ashamed of, but something to be proud of.

[00:19:02] Especially if you have stuck it out and you have done the work and you have pulled yourself up from the pit of life until the pinnacle of life. And so if you’re not there yet, you’re gonna get there. Just read this. Shattering the stigma of single motherhood, and I believe that from these stories, you’ll be inspired and you will find the courage to just keep going and keep doing the things that you’ve always dreamed about doing.

[00:19:31] That’s right. So any last words for

[00:19:34] Cindy: us, Cindy? Just to let you know, I really appreciate you having me today and it’s been so nice talking with you. And thank you for helping spread the word about my nonprofit and then also it’s wonderful to partner with you on the book and I’m super excited to, to get to know you a little better in the future. .

[00:19:49] Samantha: It’s been my pleasure as well and wonderful having you here on this show. And so that wraps up this episode and we’re so thankful that you decided to listen to us today and we hope that you will go to driving single parents website. We’re gonna have all the information in the show notes so that you can go and check it out, and you can also pick up your 99 cent e-book copy of Shattering the Stigma of Single Motherhood, and also be on the lookout for the paperback when it comes out on January 10th.

[00:20:17] I’m Samantha Gregory, it’s been a pleasure talking with you today and I hope you have an amazing rest of the week. Take care.