Reader Stories: What to Do When You Are a Struggling Single Mom?

Reader Stories: What to Do When You Are a Struggling Single Mom?

by | Jan 14, 2013

Sometimes the words single mom and struggle seems to mean the same thing. It’s hard to say one without thinking about the other. Everyday I read/hear about single moms who are struggling to make ends meet. I have been there and know how hard it is to look my kids in the face, knowing there is no money in the bank, no food in the cabinets, and no gas in the car. I know what it’s like to have the lights turned off and bill collectors calling. You may be facing this now, so I really want you to read the story below. A single mom sent this powerful testimony to me and wanted me to share it with you. What do you do when you are a struggling single mom? Pray…

God’s hand on a single mother…Karen’s Story

I will never forget Saturday morning January 12, 2013. I woke up with no money in my pocket, my bank accounts were negative and my fridge was so empty you could hear the echo if I stuck my head in it. I was on day 6 of reading my bible for 90 days and could feel the strength of God on the inside of me growing but the outside seemed hopeless.

I decided months ago that just paying my tithe every pay period wasn’t cutting it so I signed up for a program at my church called “Money Wise”. A part of this program is to have you meet up with the director so she can ask you some questions and pray to see which one of the many volunteer counselors she would be able to match you up with.

Well this Saturday my counselor was coming to meet me to discuss my finances which were just a mess. We sat down for 2 hours as I displayed the part of the bible that says “ my people perish for a lack of knowledge” because I didn’t know anything. All I knew was that I was in so much debt all built from being a single mother and not trusting God . You see, I was a survivor and never living or experiencing God as my Jehovah Jirah but today that was about to change.

That morning I woke up and prompted by a vision I went downstairs to explain to my children how the money I made came in and out of the house by demonstrating with monopoly money. They seemed to understand so we moved on to have some family time when my daughter said, “mommy what’s for breakfast?” I literally had nothing but a can of corn. Thank God she loves corn because that day that is what she ate a can of buttered corn, while me and my oldest ate nothing and my two youngest went to ask one of their friends for a package of noodles.

I told my kids that I was not being a good manager over the 90% that God was letting me keep and that the bible says if you’re not a good manager of the little, even the little would be taken. So I told them from this day they had one of two choices either get on the bandwagon with me to serve God by surrendering or get out. By their silence I believe everyone chose to get on the bandwagon with me. My oldest son said a simple prayer, “ God we don’t have anything, we need something, take care of us. Thank you. Amen. We continued on our day reading the bible, praying and just praising God we had forgot that we didn’t have dinner that night.

As I said earlier my counselor was coming over to discuss money management. She showed up and for 2 hours we discussed, planned, budgeted, set goals and I repented for my lack of knowledge, faith and no seeing God as my source. As we finished praying and my counselor was about to leave, she said to me, “We don’t normally do this but I am feeling led by the Lord to ask you how much gas do you have in your car? I said it is on “E” only enough to make it to the highway to pull over and wait for the local roadside assistance to give me a gallon of gas.

She said, “follow me”, and we went to the gas station where she put gas in my car. She then proceeded to tell me to follow her to the store and there she made me go up and down every aisle picking up the things I needed and wanted in multiples of two. By the time we got to the register I had two carts full of groceries!!!!! God is good but he didn’t stop there…

KarenBlessing1  KarenBlessing3

I went home, put those bags on the table, and me and my children took a moment and said, “Thank you God”. I asked each one of my children how they felt and one by one they expressed how amazing it was to see God’s hand move first hand. We had tacos and pizza that night and the only reason we had pizza was because it wouldn’t fit in our fridge.

Sunday came and we did our normal routine went to church, volunteered, and enjoyed the day as a family when I received a call from my counselor again asking me to meet her at a nearby Starbucks. Once I got there she handed me an orange envelope with my name on the front of it inside of the envelope was 200.00 of gas cards and 200.00 of groceries cards… Are you serious God!!! Ephesians 3:20 says God will do exceedingly and abundantly more than you can ever think of or ever ask. And God still was not finished.

KarenBlessing1On the outside of the envelope were the words “electric”, “water”, and “lease”. It meant that I would not have to worry about my electric bill that was behind a month, my water bill that was behind a month and my rent for next month would be paid as well.

God is good!! Awesome, amazing and he loves us. Here I am a single mother of 5 children, 4 that actually are home with me, one income that is being garnished at 35% for an upside down car note because I had to buy from a “buy here ,pay here” place. I had to just throw my hands up and say God I surrender. The moment I did God said, “thank you for moving out of my position”, and did the unthinkable.

I don’t know where you are as a single mother but I know it can be frustrating and embarrassing at times but trust me God wants to do things for us if we would only surrender and let him. It was so hard for me to throw up my hands up, but I am so thankful that I finally did and thank God because that was my last can of corn.

I am excited to finish in my journey of the money wise program to see how God is going to move on all of these debts and my one crave that I am asking God for daily is to get rid of this horrible car note that I got myself in to do the unthinkable again and have this $10,963.45 balance removed from my life.

Thank you God for looking down on a single mother and being faithful!!

Do you believe in the power of prayer? How has it helped you during the times you struggled the most? Talk about it in the comments below. 

Have you experienced miracles and blessings like Karen’s? Click here to share your story

Credit Talk

by | Jan 8, 2013

Having and maintaining good credit is extremely important. It can make or break you when applying for a loan, buying a major purchase (like a house), applying for a credit card, and sometimes can be a determining factor for the job you applied for. Credit can be determined by how well you make on time payments, or how well you maintain your credit cards, for example. To keep up with your credit, follow these steps below.

First, get a free copy of your credit report each year. Sometimes your state can provide a free credit report, but if they do not, you can go to freecreditreport.com and pick up one. Some banks offer credit reports as well, but there may be monthly fees attached to it. Second, make sure there are no accounts that do not belong to you on your report. Sometimes common names, both first and last names, can be linked to others with the same name. Third, check to see if there are any accounts still open in your name but did not authorize, especially if you were married or had a joint account with someone. You have the right to shut down an account or dispute any detail that is inaccurate on your credit report. The last step is to familiarize yourself with the Fair Credit Reporting Act.

Knowing about your credit score and how to find and use your reports can be a lifesaver in many ways. When getting a credit report, remember that your social security number is your key identity. Monitoring your credit report can become obsessive after a while of keeping track of it, so it is best to make it a yearly check-up, so to speak.

Save, Save, Save Some More

by | Jan 1, 2013

Saving is something that everyone should do regardless of how much money you make and what your status is socially and professionally. As talked about in the previous article “Rainy Day Funds” and other articles, it is always a good idea to save money for times that you cannot foresee from now. It is also a good idea to save for the little things that you have deserved over the year, or have wanted for a long time.

To get started on saving your money, get creative and buy a piggy bank, change jar (one that can track how much you deposit), mattresses, PayPal.com, etc. Being creative can make it fun to save, and easy to store it away from yourself. Sometimes people wait till their change jar, piggybank, or whatever container they use to overflow and deposit it. Another good way to save is to take out a 401K with your job (if they have one). They’ll take it out before your pay is taxed and deposit it into an account for you. Other things that can go into savings, whether an account or a container, is student loan refunds, stimulus checks, birthday money, and even your lottery winnings!

Whichever way you choose to save, make sure you always add to it, and not subtract from it. Saving money will always come in handy, and it will make you feel a lot richer than you might have been feeling before.

RichSingleMomma.com Top 9 Posts of 2012: The Year of Getting Finances in Order

RichSingleMomma.com Top 9 Posts of 2012: The Year of Getting Finances in Order

by | Dec 30, 2012

RSM Single Mom Money Review2012

This year on RichSingleMomma I tried to focus more on the financial side of single motherhood. It can be ugly sometimes but it doesn’t have to be a permanent state. With planning, budgeting, and a little ingenuity we can turn things around.

Here are the top 9 post on the website. Most relate to money but there are a few other top posts in there too. Click the titles to read the posts.

1. 7 Free Budget Worksheet for Single Moms

This is pretty self explanatory. I highlighted 7 free budget worksheets for single moms to use. Getting your money under control is top priority if you want to see more in the future.

2. 13 Things I Hate About Being a Single Mom

This post has been a the top for a while. Let’s face it, sometimes we hate being single moms but it’s not because of the kids but because of the bad wrap we get in the media, the crazy remarks of family, friends, and stranger too. Check out what makes me the craziest about being a single mom. Don’t judge me 😉

3. Single Mom Advice: How to Make Cash Quickly

A single mom wrote me needing advice about how to get some quick cash. In this post I shared a few ways she could get some quick cash. You might find a few ideas to help you in a crunch.

4. Quick and Easy Ways to Make Extra Money

Another post about making quick money if you have more month at the end of your regularly earned money.

5. 15 Easy Ways to Sell Your Stuff for Cash

Sometimes we have to sell stuff to get cash in hand. This post lists 15 ways you can do that by selling your stuff. Sometimes we have to part with cherished items until we get back on our fee.

6. Ignore Deadbeat Daddies and Bid Farewell to Child Support Dependence

This is one of my favorite posts. I’ve seen it time and time again. Single moms gripe, complain, incarcerate, and malign their baby’s father for not paying child support. Sure it’s hard and it’s unfair, but to live in a state of constant fighting is not the way to get what you need. I am suggesting a better way to get your needs met.

7. Disney On Ice: Dare to Dream aka The Princess Party in Atlanta, GA!

This post is about me and my kids going to the Disney on Ice event. It was fun and a blast to see all the Disney Princesses. We got to see them all again at a recent trip to Disney World too.

8. How to Become Self-Sufficient and Financially Independent as a New Single Mom

This post is a backup post to the Ignore Deadbeat Daddies post. It’s for single moms who are new to the game because they got divorced, their husband passed away, or they were deserted by their boyfriend. The goal is to help them (and you) see that you can become self-sufficient and financially independent even though you are a single mom.

9. Single Mom Budgeting on a Limited Budget

Raising a kid on $12k a year seems impossible, but with a lot of creativity and using the resources around you it can work. This post is about how to budget your money when money is very tight. I did it and you can too!

Well those are the top articles on RichSingleMomma.com. Go read them if you haven’t already and leave a comment if you have already read them. Share them with other single moms you know and come back to see what’s in store for next year. I’m declaring 2013 The Year of Living Fearlessly and Fabulously. I hope you will make that the theme for your 2013 as well.

Prioritize Your Life and Money

by | Dec 25, 2012

Money is always an issue whether you have enough of it or not enough of it. But when you worry about money and less about your life and family, you begin to lose focus of what is really important. During the Christmas and holiday seasons, it is important to prioritize. It brings a warm and loving sense of joy and relief to your life. To help bring your focus back to the more important priorities, take a look at the following tips.

Step one towards prioritizing your life is to worry less about money and focus more on living and loving life. When you allow issues to loom over your head, especially financial issues, it distracts you from happiness. Step two is to not allow money stress to strangle you.  Losing your kids and your life are the worst things you could allow to happen because of financial stress. Step three is to believe you can start over. Believing in you goes back to the previous article “As You Think, Your Money Will Be”. Learning to love your life and the trials and tribulations that you have come along and will go through is step number four. Learning to accept your life and know you are in control can do wonders to your happiness level. The last step, number 5, is to spend time and energy with your kids before they grow up. They will remember the good times you have spent together than the financial issues.

Money issues will always be present somehow, but sacrificing your life and family are not worth the issues. Put more energy into things that have more long lasting value like memories instead of health problems; it will be worth it.

Gratitude Is Big

by | Dec 18, 2012

During this holiday season (or rather any time of the year), it is important to give thanks and be grateful what we do have and what is to come. To be financially fit, it is important to give gratitude in order to receive more. As we take some time to remember those of less fortune, remind yourself of the things that you should be grateful for.

Don’t forget to pay your bills, preferably on time. The services that you pay for in exchange for money are living essentials for your daily life. Remember that you are being grateful of having the benefit to use services that the city provides, to have a phone, finance a car, and much more. When you are more grateful for things, it changes your attitude about your bills. It causes you to remember that you could be homeless and jobless or one of the other.

Bills are a blessing that allow you to pay your dues on necessary services like the lights, water, gas, and a car for example. To be grateful during the holiday season and throughout the year, it is also good to donate if possible to those of less fortunate. Even though finances may be tough and the economy even tougher, don’t forget to give thanks.