Reentering the Dating World as a Single Mom

Am I ready? Do I really want to go through this again? Do I have the time? Most single moms go through these and a whole other list of questions before they even dip their toes into the dating pool. Dating when you are single and without kids can, at times, be overwhelming, but single parent dating is a whole other story. You are not only choosing a partner for yourself but also someone for your child or children. This makes it that much harder, but not to worry, there are certain steps you can take to make your re-entry into the dating world a bit easier.

Decide what you are looking for

When we have kids, our priorities tend to change substantially. This means that we start looking for some other qualities in men than we did when we were young and single. And it is important that you take your time and make a list of what you need in a future partner.

Be careful though, don’t make one about what you don’t want, that one is easy and tends to preoccupy us a lot more. No, you need to attract someone with a certain set of qualities and that is what you need to focus on.

So, do you want an older or a younger man, do they need to have kids, or would you like someone with whom you can extend your family? These are all important issues to think about.

After all, the values and character traits of your future partner is what you will be bringing home to your kids, and you want them to have a good of a role model as you have been to them so far.

It is time to get back out there

You do want to have someone in your life, someone to rely on, someone who will love you and whom you will love. But you, as many women who have gone through several disappointing relationships and who have children, are afraid of failure and even more so you don’t want to disappoint your children, so there is a tendency to avoid the dating game altogether.

This is never a good option, so just to start you off, you might want to pay a visit to some renowned dating sites. See what is available out there in the dating pool. But make sure to be honest when you create your own profile, state clearly that you have children and how important it is to you to find someone who knows what that means.

Don’t worry, this won’t diminish your chances of finding the right date. On the contrary, you will attract those who are interested in you as a single mom and a hot-blooded woman, not just one or the other. 

After you have seen what is out there in the online world, you might want to check out the real one. Dress up, get a sitter and have a night out with your friends, maybe you’ll get to meet someone new at your local cafe or restaurant.

Finally, don’t say no to being set up. Yes, people might think they know what you want, but once in a while they actually might get it right. And at least a blind date or two will get you out of the house and back into the dating game. 

Don’t get easily discouraged

Wouldn’t it be nice to get that prince charming on the first try? Well, you might get lucky, but you also need to be prepared to kiss a few frogs first. Starting dating again means that you will get to meet a lot of different men, some might be similar to what you are looking for and some the complete opposite. 

However, the most important thing is that you are finally out there, meeting new people, going out and having fun. So, if the first few dates don’t go exactly as you wanted them to, it’s ok, that happens, there is someone out there for you, just don’t get discouraged.

Also, don’t settle if you find only one of his ten jokes funny, and you don’t seem to have that much in common, you can say thank you, next (well, not to his face).

Dating someone just to avoid being alone will prevent you from meeting the person you should be with. So, stay in the game until you find exactly what you are looking for, or until he finds you.

No one said reentering the dating game as a single mom is going to be easy, but hey, you are raising a child alone and there is nothing, and we mean nothing, that can scare you.

That said, take some ‘me’ time, get dressed so that you feel fabulous and get out there, your future Mr. Right might be closer than you think!