This has been a slow week on the blog but a busy week in my life. That doesn’t mean that I don’t care about you guys. I am very concerned about how all of you are doing.

I got an email from a lady who is having a really rough time with unemployment and custody battles for her kids. It saddens me that so many are struggling. It is a fact of life, but I am a firm believer that things can and will change with a lot of prayer, a plan, and perseverance. A good support network is priceless as well.

Survival is the theme of most single moms. Whether it’s the struggle to get adequate childcare, a better job, to put food on the table, or a hundred other things, survival is the common element.

Too often surviving becomes such a large focus of life that it completely overshadows everything else. What happens when survival is the focus? You forget about the little things. The kids become an annoyance or you forget about all the dreams you had.

So how do you move from surviving to thriving? How do you remember the dreams and goals you had just a few years ago? Here are a few tips that I’ve personally tested out:

1.  Write down your dreams. When you write them down you give yourself a chance to remember them. Remembering your dreams jump starts your desire to move past simply surviving and toward thriving.

2.  Create a Life Vision. Imagine how you want your life to look 6 months, a year, or 5 years from now. What are you doing? Where are you living? Hold that vision in your mind, write it in a journal, or create a vision board. Remember that the things you dwell on will come become the reality.

3.  Get rid of all the things (and people) that you are tolerating. Sometimes we get so used to those little nagging things in our lives. That leaky faucet. That obnoxious friend. That abusive boyfriend. The job you hate. These things wear us down and make us feel stuck. You cannot thrive when you feel off center. So list the things you are tolerating in your life and systematically cross them off after you have eliminated them from your life.

4.  Decide to be Happy. Is happiness a feeling or a decision? I think most of us are confused about that. We think that happiness is an emotion that is activated based on our circumstances. Well it doesn’t have to be that way. We can be happy simply because we’ve decided to be. That doesn’t mean you have to walk around with a big grin on your face. It simply means that you will have peace and joy in your heart. You will see the positive and ignore the rest (as best you can). You can decide to be happy.

5.  Get a positive support system. Being around positive people is contagious. You will never have to worry about them raining on your parade or intentionally making you feel bad. They’ll want the best for you and give you the push you need when you feel rotten. Being around positive people will rub off on you, but beware that if you haven’t learned to be positive you will lose the people who can help you the most. Positive people want to stay that way and will cut off a negative person in a heartbeat. So begin developing a positive mental attitude (PMA) and seek out people with the same mentality.

Well these five tips should get you going on your journey to thrive. Never be afraid to step out of your old habits and mindsets. You can move past the dead end road called survival and get on the freeway to joyful thriving. Are you up for the challenge?

Samantha Gregory

Samantha A. Gregory is an author, consultant, and speaker. She’s a single-mom lifestyle, money, and parenting expert featured in The Washington Post, The New York Times, Essence Magazine, HuffPost, ABC News, and Mint.com.

Samantha founded the award-winning RichSingleMomma.com™, the first online magazine featuring personal finance, parenting, and personal development content and courses for single moms.

She aims to inspire women who are ready to thrive and not just survive in their single motherhood journey. Connect with her on Instagram @richsinglemomma.