When Unemployment Knocks on Your Door

When Unemployment Knocks on Your Door

by | May 23, 2012

unemplyment pink slip

Over the last nine months I have been out of corporate America. In other words I am technically unemployed. Despite that my bills are getting paid and I’m learning what it means to be humble and wait for God to show me the right path to take.

I can blame everything on the recession but it would be pointless. It really wouldn’t change the circumstances of my life. I have good days and more challenging ones.

The great thing about unemployment is the time I’ve been able to spend with my kids. It’s been priceless being a stay at home/ work at home/homeschool mom. My children seem to like it too. My son is thriving and my daughter is too. She got straight A’s, is well liked, is a leader, and is involved in activities outside of school designed to build her sense of worth up.

This could have been a terrible time for me, but I’ve had the opportunity to stretch my faith, discover more of myself, and define my purpose.

I’m sure that I want to continue helping women realize their value, embrace their freedom, and attract love and wealth. I’ll be sharing more with you soon because I’m excited about the programs I’m about to bring you, so watch for them.

This journey has been a good learning experience for me. There is plenty more to learn though which means I’ll always be a student of life…

Why Your Resolutions Will Fail If You Don’t Do This One Thing

by | Jan 3, 2012

This is the time of year people make resolutions. Did you do that this year? Do you fully expect to look back on the year 2012 and say, “I kept all my resolutions this year!”? How many people do you know who can actually say that?

Do you know why they fail each and every year? It’s because they do not do this one thing.

They don’t WRITE IT DOWN!

That’s correct. They do not write it down, so it does not happen.

The Power of Writing

I am a firm believer in the power of the pen.  Once it’s on paper it is final. The decision is made. There is no turning back.

To write down your resolution is to give it life.

It is a resolve to reach a goal. It is an announcement that tells the world you have something important to do for the year.

Yet millions of people forget about their resolutions after the first week because, firstly, they didn’t put any real thought into it and, secondly, they did not write it down.

Vision Boards Are The Best!

This year I did something a little different. I created a vision board and hung it on the wall facing my bed so it is the first thing I see with the morning light. I am reminded each day of the goals I plan to reach for the year.

First I wrote down my goals after thoughtful reflection. I began with the end in mind and set out to create a vision for my year.

Next, I cut out pictures and words to inspire me and help me remember my goals.

Finally, I pasted the pictures and words in a collage on a poster board.

It takes a little time to do this exercise but it is worth it. Why? Because you will have direction for the days and weeks that make up your year.

Here is a sample of a how to make a vision board

Why People (Including Single Moms) Fail Miserably

Year after year people live in depression and misery and wonder why they can’t get a break. They complain about the same things, people, and circumstances.

If you are a single mom you live with anger and resentment and worry because you don’t have enough money to put food on the table or buy your child new shoes. Or maybe you are feeling lonely and suffer in silence with a bag of chips.

The number one culprit is lack of or incorrect focus and purpose. Sure the problems are real, but when you focus on the problems, it creates more problems.

The Point of Living is Living On Purpose

What is the point of living if you do not have something to focus on? Why go on day after day doing the same things, in the same ways, yet expecting different results?

It sounds harsh but the reality is, your life will be a mirror image of last year and all it’s failures if you don’t do anything about it.

If you want love, a business, a better job, a changed life, write it down. But it is helpful to take it a step further by being specific about what you want.

This could be tricky because, too often, we don’t know what we want. But your heart knows. Listen to it and trust it to point you in the right direction.

Set S.M.A.R.T goals: Specific – Measurable – Attainable – Relevant – Time-bound, to get the best results.

Action Steps:

  1. Think about your greatest desires (let your heart guide you)
  2. Write them in a journal, on a sheet of paper, or in the computer
  3. Create a vision board (optional)
  4. Go and live your life on purpose!

Discussion Questions:

Do you make New Year’s resolutions?

Which ones did you keep the entire year?

What actions steps will you take this month to create the kind of life you want to live in 2012?

How To Keep Kids Safe From Sexual Predators

How To Keep Kids Safe From Sexual Predators

by | Nov 10, 2011

keepkidssafe

As a single mom it makes sense that we would want a mentor for our sons. But with the recent news about the assistant football coach at Penn State’s alleged sexual misconduct (or worse) with young boys, it’s a reason to give pause to the potential dangers of letting unrelated family members handle our children.

Get the Facts Before You Trust Someone with Your Child

I’m not an alarmist and I like hear all the facts, but this hits close to home for me. When my son was younger I trusted a man to mentor him and help him through life. I was distraught at the possibility that my son would turn out to be another statistic, growing up without a father and no direction.

This is What Happens When You Don’t Get the Facts

The thing is, many guys know this about single moms and prey on us when we are in this emotionally charged state of mind. I let my guard down and let a man into my life that would do years of damage to me and my family, especially my then 2-year old son.

I married that man and lived to regret it. He was an abuser of the worse kind. His abuse, though primarily pointed at me, was aimed directly at my son. I cannot go into the details of the abuse but I have a strong belief that he molested him.

The Damage A Child Sexual Predator Can Do Last For Years

My son could not verbalize what happened to him in that way, but I know by evidence of child porn on my computer and the reactions my son had each time I tried to change his diaper (potty training was delayed) and bath him that something was terribly wrong.

I was smart enough to end the marriage quickly and begin the healing process for myself and my children. It has taken years for my son to get through this experience. He suffered post traumatic stress disorder for years. He acted out, his development was delayed, and he has trouble learning in the “traditional” way. He had/has multiple phobias including fear of water, insects, heights and dogs.

It is Possible to Recover From Abuse

The up side is he is now a very happy, friendly young man. He is loyal, polite, and willing to go the extra mile. He is now teaching himself to swim, insects don’t bother him as much; neither do heights. He is still leery of dogs and will panic if one comes too near him.

We have close ties with family so he gets along well and trusts my dad, brother, and brother-in-law.

With much prayer he is a “normal” testosterone-driven boy with natural athletic ability.

I’m proud of him but I often wonder what our lives would have been like if I had not let my fears and emotions cloud my judgement. What would life have been like if I had never let that man into my life, my home, and around my children?

How to Protect Kids from Predators

I will never know, but what I do know is I always question any man who takes an extreme/odd interest in my son. He does not do sleepovers with any family other than my own. I make sure that every person involved in his life know that we are stable and happy so no need to interject your opinion or try to be a father-figure.

Living with Regret and Shame is Just as Damaging

I used to beat myself up about what happened in our family but now I know it is all a part of life. Rehashing it and living in shame over it is not the key to living a healthy life. It is also not good for my children to see me in a constant state of depression and guilt over past mistakes. We learn from them and we always move forward.

What happened with the Penn State assistant couch is horrible. I hope it will be a wake-up call for every single mom and every parent who entrusts their children to others. No matter how upstanding or polished a person seems, we have to trust our instincts and check them out.

The Hand That Really Rules the World

by | Oct 26, 2011

In our current political climate it’s easy to feel uneasy about the way the world is going. As women we sometimes feel powerless as we watch grown men bicker, fight, and sabotage our world because of egos and power struggles.

But we have forgotten just how powerful we really are. We have to find our power and use it for good so our children’s future will be secure. We can do it without running the economy in the ground, without violent protests, and without waging wars that ultimately affects women and children worldwide.

We have to remember (or finally learn) that women truly rule the world. It’s time to take our power back. It’s time to use our gifts to influence the men in our lives (husbands, uncles, brothers, cousins, and friends).

Maybe this poem by William Ross Wallace will put things in perspective for you:

The Hand That Rocks the Cradle

Oh, no matter where the place;
Would that never storms assailed it,
Rainbows ever gently curled;
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.

Infancy’s the tender fountain,
Power may with beauty flow,
Mother’s first to guide the streamlets,
From them souls unresting grow–
Grow on for the good or evil,
Sunshine streamed or evil hurled;
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.

Woman, how divine your mission
Here upon our natal sod!
Keep, oh, keep the young heart open
Always to the breath of God!
All true trophies of the ages
Are from mother-love impearled;
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.

Blessings on the hand of women!
Fathers, sons, and daughters cry,
And the sacred song is mingled
With the worship in the sky–
Mingles where no tempest darkens,
Rainbows evermore are hurled;
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world.
William Ross Wallace

and for a little modern reminder, courtesy of Summer’s Eve, “Hail to the V”! I love this commercial!