How to Become Self-Sufficient and Financially Independent as a New Single Mom

How to Become Self-Sufficient and Financially Independent as a New Single Mom

by | Jun 17, 2011

That seems like the million dollar question, but it’s a very real one to ask. Facing single motherhood after divorce is pretty scary. If you have been dependent on a spouse for the last few years and now face doing it all alone it can feel overwhelming

Hopefully you have been thinking about all of this during the separation process but if you haven’t here are some tips to get you on your feet and heading toward independence and economic self-sufficiency.

  1. Change your mindset – If your mind is filled with fear and negativity about your situation or your ex you will not get very far. Your thoughts determine your level of success so start thinking positively.

2. Dream and set goals – Think about where you want to be. How does your ideal life look? Think about it in detail then write down what it will take to get there. After that make a list of all the things you need to do. Keep your dream, your strategy, and your list in a place you can see it each day.

3. Get your kids on board and train them to help themselves – The pressure of raising kids alone is magnified if the kids are overly dependent on you for their age. Teach them how to do age appropriate things and learn how to solve problems on their own (with your guidance)

4. Create a one income spending plan – Things have changed and child support (even with a court order) may not be very reliable or always available. Live within the means you have and get temporary assistance when you need it. This is not the time to be proud if you are struggling

5. Get a better job or train for a new career to make more money – This is important because it will often determine how quickly you become financially independent. Look for a training program that fits your personality and lifestyle choice. Keep learning by taking advantage of every free resource and growing by paying for training you can’t get for free but will give you better opportunities.

6. Learn to be frugal and control your spending – look for sales, bargains, and freebies. You are trying to live below your means until you are financially independent.

7. Pay cash or use debit cards – Stay out of debt and cut up all your credit cards. Paying case ensures you will not go into debt, which causes stress.

8. Cut your expenses – Continue to reduce your spending by cutting unnecessary expenses like that over bloated cable plan, the landline, and any other frivolous services. Instead get Netflix, a pre-paid cell phone, and shop at thrift stores for a while.

9. Make extra money – Baby sit or get a weekend job at a restaurant (free or discounted food for your family) or department store (reduced prices and discounts for clothes and/or household items). Use your skill to tutor someone as well. Finally, sell your diamond engagement ring for some cold hard cash!

10. Save 5-10% of your income – each pay period be sure to pay yourself. Live on the money you have left over.

11. Give to charity – Give back with your time, money, clothing or other resources. It helps you remember how blessed you are and this is a good example for your kids to learn how to help others. The benefit is more blessings coming to you.

These tips are just the beginning of the process but if you follow them you will be in a better place a year from now. No matter how overwhelmed you feel, NEVER give up. Though the situation is hard and overwhelming, you have the unique opportunity to create the life you’ve always wanted.

This weekend I’ll share my personal story of how I became self-sufficient and financially independent.

How to Salvage Muffin Mix and a Life of Mistakes

by | Apr 5, 2011

This weekend my son (age 10) wanted to go solo in cooking muffins for breakfast. He loves to help in the kitchen and had watched and helped me over a dozen times. I gave him instructions and let him go at it with encouragement to ask me about anything he didn’t understand. He assured me (quite like a typical male) that he had it and didn’t need directions or my help…

A few minutes later I started smelling something weird. The silicone muffin pan he used was putting off awful smelling fumes and the remnants of the muffin mix that didn’t make it into the pan were starting to burn. I went into the kitchen to investigate and found that he didn’t exactly follow the instructions.

The muffin batter was watery because (more…)

How to Make Important Decisions in 3 Easy Steps

by | Apr 4, 2011

Making a decision can be scary. What if you don’t make the right one? What if that decision affects others badly? What if the decision cannot be reversed or costs you lost time and money?

There seems to be very few people who are comfortable with making decisions. I am afraid to make decisions at times too but I find that when I make a decision the stress and uncertainty vanishes and I am able to move forward.

For those times I am paralyzed with fear in making a decision I have to run through a few steps to get to the point where I feel safe. I will share them with you momentarily. But first I’d like to talk about the kinds of decisions we need/want to make and why. (more…)

A Life Worth Living

by | Feb 17, 2011

To achieve your Core Desires-whether they are earning more money, enjoying more intimacy, or having more joy in your life-you need to grow, become more, learn, and change. How fast you grow is within your control; you can experience great growth if you desire it. But you can’t just sense a need to change; you can’t “sorta” want to be more or have more. If you are willing to grow, life as you have known it will never be the same.

If you choose to grow, you accept the fact that you are not helpless or unable to create the happiness you want in your life. Neither are you limited in your options. What will limit your growth is the inability to identify accurately your Core Desires and unleash your Conquering Force.

TWO LAWS OF ABUNDANT LIVING
Be willing to become all that is within you to become. Be willing to change, trust, risk, and create opportunities where none existed before.

1. Be willing to learn and grow.
If you are willing to learn and grow, you become more and have more. You will need to learn and grow in order to make the changes you desire in your circumstances.

2. Be open and honest with yourself and others.
Have past experiences made you fearful or closed? Do you play games with others? Are you totally honest with yourself? Finding your Core Desires is the place to start .To discover your 100s, you must be honest.

To initiate change, you must first accept that who you are and what you have today are largely consequences of the choices and decisions you have made. Instituting change requires that you make different choices now-and in the future. Acknowledge that you always have choices and that you control the choices you make. To make different decisions, you must change yourself-not just the things you do or say, but also what you have your heart set on.

Lasting, dynamic personal growth takes place within your heart. If you can change your heart, you can change your destiny. You may not experience immediate growth just because you accept a truth in your mind; you must also feel it in your heart. Only a Core Desire can cause you to take action on a truth you have mentally accepted. Saying, “I know I should do that,” will not bring about change and
growth, but wanting it with all your heart will.

Your mind has the ability to learn and apply what it knows; your heart provides the reason to put the knowledge to work. The best way to change your heart is to replace falsehoods and incorrect paradigms with truths and correct paradigms that you feel strongly about-not just understand. Truths can set you free if you embrace them wholeheartedly. The more truths you learn and embrace, the freer you will become. Many of your obstacles will disappear, and you will overcome all others by using your Conquering Force. We choose if-and how-we grow. Our hearts and our minds are under our control, and we can access and mold them. No one else can do this for us. Our Core Desires and our commitment to truth are the chief sculptors of our lives.

People are like Thoroughbred horses in that they are of great value and capable of great speed. Yet they are often constrained by an invisible rope of their own creation. This invisible rope limits how far and how fast they can run. The rope is our wrong, limiting self-paradigm deep inside-made by poor choices that affect our decisions and activities. Until that rope is cut by a new decision, we are unable to run the race of life unfettered.

Author’s Bio

Jack M. Zufelt is a bestselling author and has achieved worldwide recognition for teaching people the true cause of all achievement. His life’s mission is to impart the truth about-and dispel the myths surrounding-success and achievement. Want to achieve better results? How about live a fuller life with more happiness, joy, and satisfaction? Discover Jack’s DNA of Success and live the life you’ve always wanted… Click Here -> http://www.DNAofSuccess.com

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How to Start Over When Things Seem Hopeless

by | Nov 22, 2010

This morning my email thought for today was important enough for me to share with you because it says everything I’ve believed about handling mistakes, second chances, and starting over.

It’s easy to stay stuck and wallow in self-pity, but that will never get you to the dreams you have for your life. Consider these words and how you will implement it into your life: (more…)

[Video] How to Let Go and Live

by | Nov 3, 2010

I had a few things on my mind I wanted to share with you so I put it in a video. Basically I’m encouraging you all to make the decision to let go and move forward in your life. The things you should let go of may vary depending on your situation.

The point is if you are holding on to something, struggling with something and it’s holding you back; let it go! It may be a person, a job situation, a habit that keeps you stuck and unproductive. That’s not good for you if you want to make progress in your life.

I’ve been procrastinating these last few months over letting a few things go and it has caused feelings of anxiety and depression. That is not how I want to live so I had to let it go. But when I let it go I had an immediate feeling of relief and freedom. I want this for you too.

I hope you will leave a comment and talk to me about what you need to let go. Is it a relationship? A job? A living situation?

Also, what would you like for me to talk more about? Do you enjoy the videos? What hot topic have you been wanting me to write about or do a video on? Let me know in the comments below.